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Posted August 4, 2015

Book: The Catholic Guide to Dating after Divorce
Author: Lisa Duffy
Ave Maria Press. Notre Dame, IN. 2015. Pp 172

An Excerpt from the Jacket:

In The Catholic Guide to Dating After Divorce, Duffy combines personal experience, Church teaching, and more than twenty years of ministering to those wounded by divorce to offer a guide that shows how faith can be a catalyst for healthy relationships. Duffy also identifies the five essential characteristics of spiritually healthy people and shows how cultivating these qualities can bring out the best, most confident, and most attractive version of anyone.

An Excerpt from the Book:

In his bestselling book The Five Love Languages, author Gary Chapman talks about the different ways people demonstrate love for their partner. He points out that not everyone responds to every language, and most prefer one over another. Some people feel loved when they receive gifts; others prefer words of affirmation. For some people an act of service is what really makes them feel loved. But the overwhelming discovery was that, not only does each person have their own love language, but also they are attracted to people who speak a different love language than their own. So as you date someone and begin to get to know him better, you can discover how to show him affection in a way that makes him feel even more attracted to you.

If the idea of being affectionate without sexual intimacy is appealing but not something that comes naturally to you, here are some suggestions that may help you cultivate ways to show others non-sexual affection.

For people in general

Smile more and make eye contact that reveals sincerity.
Give side-by-side hugs.
Be receptive to a friend's request and do your best to fulfill it.
Anticipate a friend or family member's needs and plan accordingly.

For someone you are dating, all of the above plus:

Leave a love note in his wallet.
Bring her flowers
Compliment him on something good he has done.
Call just to say hello
Leave the gas tank full in the car and a pack of her favorite gum on the console.
If you have a long-distance relationship, send a care package.
Spend an hour in Eucharistic adoration for her
Hold hands wherever you are.
Surprise him with a picnic instead of opting for a restaurant.
Compliment her hair style.
Send a card for no particular reason.
Speak well of her in front of family and friends.
Speak well of his parents and show them respect.
Make her favorite dish. Help clean up after the meal.
Surprise him with tickets to a game.

Table of Contents:

1. Getting ready to love
2. Being available
3. Being affectionate
4. Being a communicator
5. Being faithful
6. Being magnanimous
7. The complete package

Appendix 1
Catholic resources to answer your questions

Appendix 2
Good reads